Erik nodded his thanks to the bartender for the latest round of drinks and continued. “Let's face it, Gordon,” he said with a smirk. “The only way the word 'humanitarian' could ever be used to describe you would involve irony and you taking up cannibalism.”

Gordon rolled his eyes. “Oh, very nice,” he retorted, sounding unimpressed.

“Like a vegetarian and vegetables,” Erik persisted, his smirk deepening.

“I got it the first time, thanks,” Gordon sneered.

Erik remained undeterred however, the social magic of drinking loosening his tongue where the alcohol failed to do so. “I mean even your issues have issues!”

“Here it comes,” Gordon proclaimed to the heavens, “the armchair psychological analysis by the time-displaced prince and modern inheritor of an ancient mantle of divinity!” He rubbed his hands together in mock anticipation and settled back into his chair. “This should be good,” Gordon said with an even fiercer sneer than before, demonstrating that, unlike his chuckle, he had mastered that expression to perfection.

Erik just ignored him. “Do you realize how schizophrenic you made yourself sound in that story?” he asked. “Most people telling stories about themselves try to put themselves in a good light, but not you!” Erik shook his head. “I swear that for half of that story you were looking down your nose at one thing or another about someone, then spending the other half doing exactly what you were so piously disdainful over a few moments earlier.”

Gordon deflected Erik's point with a dismissive wave of his hand. “Spare me your poor attempts at intellectualizing things beyond your training or your comprehension. 'Schizophrenic' . . . please!” Gordon reached for his drink and took a long swig before setting the glass down once more. “There's a demon running around in my head, boy!” he unnecessarily reminded Erik. “Psychology hasn't even gotten around to inventing terms to describe that, much less what it does to a mind, so by definition, I am not 'schizophrenic!'”

“Yeah . . . it doesn't exactly make you sound any less crazy when you say things like that, Gordon.” Erik told him with a grin and a wink as he drained his own glass.

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